Food recipe: You cuss, I cuss, we all cuss for asparagus

Vegetable Food Recipe Week: Day 4
Yes, folks, the wait is over, because now you know that today's veg is none other than the much adored asparagus.

Asparagus is so massively easy that I will give you three, yes THREE, totally delicious, totally amazing, totally fast and easy variations on a single recipe. Giving you four totally unique and totally wonderful ways with asparagus.

Isn't that just totally?!

So buckle your seat belts because it's gonna be a delicious ride (with apologies to Bette Davis).
Food recipe: Basic asparagus recipe that is anything but basic
1 bunch asparagus, washed and with the tough ends (not the tips) snapped off
1-2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil
1/2 teaspoon sea salt, the best quality you can find (we're using Portuguese these days and totally loving it)
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

Put the olive oil into a sauté pan, heat on medium to medium high, until hot (you can tell it is hot when you sprinkle a few drops of water on the pan and they dance for you), then add the asparagus, salt, and black pepper.

Cook, occasionally turning the asparagus with a spatula, until the stalks are al dente and sporadically charred on the outside (a few minutes should do, depending on how high your burner gets).

Remove to a plate and eat 'em all up before anyone comes running to see what that wonderful smell is and tries to share in your bounty.
Now, you can eat your asparagus like that, and call it a day - or night, or whatever - heaven knows, I often do, but if you want to have fun, and don't we all, you can vary this recipe to suit your desires.
Food recipe: Basic asparagus recipe that is anything but basic: Variation #1
1 order of cooked basic asparagus recipe
1 lemon, cut into quarters

Serve the asparagus with the lemon slices. If you want to get fancy, dip the tip of the lemon slices into some paprika. It's right pretty. Totally unnecessary. But pretty.

Food recipe: Basic asparagus recipe that is anything but basic: Variation #2
1 order of cooked basic asparagus recipe
1/4 - 1/2 cup grated parmigiano reggiano

Right after you plate the asparagus, while it is still hot, sprinkle the cheese on top. Eat. Quickly (see above mention of running people and horribly presumptuous attempts to share).

Food recipe: Basic asparagus recipe that is anything but basic: Variation #3
1 order of cooked basic asparagus recipe
1 tablespoon the best French Dijon mustard you can find

Just before you take the asparagus out of the pan, drizzle the mustard over the stalks. Stir, stir, and stir. Then plate. And, of course, eat.
And so ends our next-to-last edition of Vegetable Food Recipe Week. Stay tuned for tomorrow when we unveil a surprise vegetable. Surprise because it is really a fruit! Whatever could it be? To find out, drop by tomorrow, same bat day, same bat time (well, okay, certainly a different day and probably a different time) for the last, and final, installment of what must surely be world renown by now: Vegetable Food Recipe Week.