How to remove the stems from your strawberries with just a straw

So I'm talking to the husband this morning while I'm simultaneously removing stems from a bunch of strawberries.

You see, I make a 'nanner every morning for breakfast and this is the fastest way I know to remove the stems.

I'm blabbing away about fairly meaningless stuff, when I realize the husband is very intently watching what I am doing with the straw. Actually, he is beyond intent. He is transfixed.

Carnage visited on innocent strawberries
"What are you doing?"

"I'm removing the stems from the strawberries."

"Your removing the stems? With a straw?"

"Yeah. See, it's an old trick. What you do is put the straw into the strawberry from the bottom, and when it comes out the top, it removes the stems."

"You're disemboweling the strawberries."


"In public."


"And you don't care who knows about it."


"And you think my video games are violent? Ha!"